A Legacy of Love: Ashlyn Buelow

Thirteen years ago at her daughter’s celebration of life, Shannon Buelow told those gathered there how Ashlyn, who never grew taller than 5-foot, lived big, prayed big, studied big, practiced big, smiled big, and loved huge. Since that day, the Buelow family have been honoring their daughter and sister in huge ways– by how they live and the memorials they give.
Ashlyn was a tenacious competitor as a horseman, winning countless awards in 4-H horse shows and rodeos. She had grit, once breaking her back at a rodeo and two weeks later winning a state title at the South Dakota 4-H Horse Show. But according to Shannon, what set Ashlyn apart as a competitor was her passion for life. Shannon said, “She lived her life in servanthood of our Lord, and everything she did, she did with excitement, and she poured everything into it.” Shannon laughs and remembers how Ashlyn, who was always small in stature, made everything fun and exciting, even hours of practice for her passions– basketball and rodeo. She even constructed her own bench press out of a broomstick and weights.
Ashlyn’s Bible was well-used, full of tabs and markings. She had verses written on note cards that were stuck on her wall, reminding her how to live. Shannon remarked, “It was just really exciting at 13 years of age to know her deep love for God.” One of the verses Ashlyn had hung in her room was Philippians 2:3-4, which reads, “Don’t be selfish. Don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too.” Shannon said, “That verse was something she read every day, and she lived [it].”
After Ashlyn passed away, the Buelow’s wanted to honor her memory and continue sharing her testimony “because she is so worth honoring.” They chose her life verse as the basis for the Ashlyn Buelow Memorial Award that they began giving to a contestant at the Hamlin County 4-H Horse Show. Shannon and her family recognized that usually in competition, the adults are the judges, but they wanted to do things differently. Shannon said, “We decided that we would share that Bible verse always in honor of her, and we would give a buckle to the person voted by their peers as someone who they felt met those qualifications within that beautiful Bible verse.”
In the beginning, many of those winning the memorial were Ashlyn’s friends and peers. As the years have gone on, fewer of the kids have personally known Ashlyn, so they began meeting with the winners, an experience Shannon describes as “sheer joy.” They have enjoyed getting to know them and seeing what they have in common with Ashlyn. Shannon describes them as “kids of great integrity, kind hearts, helping hands, smiles that light up rooms” and as “difference makers.” Being able to share Ashlyn’s story with those who have won the award makes it more meaningful, ensuring it won’t just gather dust on a shelf, and the Buelow’s are proud of all who have won the buckle in Ashlyn’s honor: Camryn Buelow, Roni (Jankord) Mack, Kassidy (Noem) Peters, Ryder Grantham, Mickeala (Boyd) Ruddy, Rachel Boyd, Brittany (Wittnebel) Burch, Laura Larson, Abby Carlson, Sierra Boyd, Brielle Jenc, and Kate Dede.
Being able to honor Ashlyn and share her testimony brings her family joy, and they find it rewarding “still being able to do something for her.” Shannon said, “We like to keep Ashlyn’s memory alive. We talk about her every day. There are people who never knew her that feel like they know her because we share her memory.” Shannon always says that when she grows up, she wants to be like Ashlyn. Those are some big boots to fill.
2024 was a “hard pill to swallow” for the Buelow family because it meant that they had now “missed her as long as we were blessed with her.” So, they wanted to do something extra special to honor Ashlyn. The summer Ashlyn passed away, her goal was to win the Pole Bending at the South Dakota 4-H Horse Show, which she did, but she never got to see her buckle. She had also qualified for the South Dakota 4-H Rodeo Finals for the first time, but she never got to make the trip to Ft. Pierre. With the help of one of Ashlyn’s friends, they were connected with someone at the South Dakota 4-H Rodeo Committee and were honored and blessed to be able to sponsor a saddle for the event that Ashlyn was practicing for at the time of her accident– Jr. Girls Pole Bending.
As the Buelow’s sat and watched the rodeo last August, those moments both hurt and healed. Shannon remarked how special it was “just hearing [Ashlyn’s] name, knowing that one of these little cowgirls, that was working every bit as hard as Ashlyn did, was going to get blessed with a saddle for their hard work that would carry Ashlyn’s name.” By the end of the weekend, CeCe Cowan was the Jr. Girls Pole Bending Champion, and the Buelow family was impressed by her grace, as there had been a spelling mistake on her champion saddle, meaning that there would be a delay in her receiving the award for her hard work. CeCe took it in stride, just as Ashlyn would have– “a true champion,” Shannon noted.
The Buelow family plans to continue honoring Ashlyn and expanding how they do these memorials. Shannon said they have prayed about it, and people have been “laid on [their] hearts” that deserve to be honored. In 2024, the Buelow family honored South Dakota Governor Kristi Noem with an Ashlyn Buelow Memorial buckle. Noem and Shannon grew up together, playing on the same basketball team, being members of the same 4-H Club, and rodeoing together, and then their girls got to do the same thing– special friendships that crossed generations. When Ashlyn passed away, Noem was one of the first people to show up at Buelow’s house after the accident. According to Shannon, “She put her life on hold for our family.” Neom is one of many that have been there for the Buelow’s since their tragedy, and Shannon says these are things they will never forget. To Shannon, “The list is endless.” So is the list of those who have been touched and inspired by Ashlyn– whether they knew her in this life or not.
That is just how it is– when someone lives big and loves huge, their legacy is huge, too.




