Baxter Black: Brand Name Beef
January 19, 2015
ROADSIDE CHUCK Delicious cuts of beef collected from scenic highways around the country. Flattened to the peak of tenderness.
COUNTY LINE CUTS (A division of Borders Beef Co.) Steaks and stew meat with an exotic history. Green card available upon request.
PENCIL THIN MEATS The closest thing you can get to jerky and still pay fresh meat prices.
HYDEN HARE Novelty meats for teething babies and dog training.
NO FAT PATS Ground meat from aged, exercised beef, supplied by Vold Rodeo Productions.
HOLIDAY HELPER Pressed patties preformed in the shape of the occasion; Santa, a turkey, a football, the judge's gavel.
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SPACE FOODS Shrink wrapped, unidentifiable portions intended to be served a long way from point of purchase.
SWEET MEATS Chocolate covered chicken kidneys, beef liver or sliced pork tongue, expensively and individually wrapped in foil.
MARINATED MERRY MEAT Your choice of brisket or flank steak marinated in the fruit juice of the day. Hawaiian punch, grape, etc.
CHURCHILL DOWNS SPORTS MEAT A line of highly select steaks and specialty cuts from near winners.
CERTIFIED BEEF BEEF Guaranteed to contain less than .2 percent by wt. rodent hair, weevils, water buffalo. Sho Glo, Wildroot Cream Oil and Spam.
MA'S DEHYDRATED DELI MEATS Excellent for busy traveler. Simply open the handy zip lock bag and add water. Makes its own gravy!
SIERRA SAM'S ALL NATURAL TRAIL MIX A delightful concoction of dried beef, pine needles, shredded Environmental Impact Statements and quaky bark.
BILLY BOB'S BEEF TALLOW Great for your complexion. Eat it, drink it or rub it on!
LO TAR TIBITS Small portions from non-smoking steers.
WYOMING ONE SHOT SELECT Stew meat marinated in liquid smoke. Contains a tantalizing hint of antelope.